Thursday, October 26, 2006

The Procrastination Boogey

I have a life-long vice, born of low self-esteem and fear, called "procrastination". It isn't with me all the time, but enough to annoy me. Fear of failing at whatever I plan to do - from creative endeavours to canning - sometimes gets the better of me. This week I'm struggling with some housework, having little energy during the recovery from the various illnesses of late. I have PMS out the yin/yang, and want nothing more than to sit with a heating pad and do some beadwork on my ministerial jacket. But, that nagging SHOULD monster, reminds me that I bought cilantro to make hummus, and not to use it is a waste... And I have a Metis shirt to finish for a friend by Saturday... and I should be making lunch for my hard-working husband... Yet, the laundry is done and needs transferring to the dryer (too cold to hang outside right now, and I'm too tired to hang it even if it was nice)... But we have the house to clean for an all-day session of clients on Saturday, and our shamanic gathering on Sunday. The list goes on... I'm paralyzed into inactivity trying to keep it all straight in my head. My back aches before I lift a handful of wet wash... Sigh. I'll refill my coffee and see if that helps. Sigh. My husband will likely complain when I'm up tonight at midnight trying to get this stuff all done. Sigh.

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